‘The Beginner’s Guide To…’ is a series of how-to and reference books that provide readers with a basic understanding of complex and often dangerous topics. The first guide was released in 2003 and a further 87 have been released since. Topics include ‘Extracting Your Own Gallbladder’, ‘Building Your Own Submarine’, and ‘Dating A Kardashian’.

The Beginner’s Guide To The Best Stances To Take When Farting While Rock Climbing became a popular book for rock climbers who ate lots of sauerkraut or eggs upon its release in 2004. 

SYNOPSIS

The Beginner’s Guide To The Best Stances To Take When Farting While Rock Climbing is a fun, insightful and easy-to-follow book that will guide you from making sure your locking carabiners are safely attached to the rock face all the way to the loosest underpants for the optimal ease of your gaseous release.

If you’ve ever found yourself clinging to the side of a rock 500 feet above the hard ground and needing to let out a potentially destabilizing fart but don’t know which stance is safest, then this is the book for you! 

This step-by-step guide will teach you the rudimentary techniques of taking up a safe and secure stance while letting one rip on the side of a mountain.

This easy-to-use guide also teaches you how to

• How to connect two carabiner locks together for those farts that need a little more effort to force out.
• How the use of chalk can give you a better grip on the rock for the post-fart exhale.
• Best use of the Personal Anchor System (PAS), an adjustable system that attaches you to an anchor point while farting or clearing up any follow-through.

You’ll learn all you need and have the skills to find the perfect stance so that whenever you ‘let go’, you don’t let go!